


Lions and Tigers and Snippets

by LitGal



Series: Not in Kansas Anymore [6]
Category: NCIS, Stargate Atlantis, Stargate SG-1
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-15
Updated: 2016-05-14
Packaged: 2018-03-30 15:06:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 10,190
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3941350
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LitGal/pseuds/LitGal
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What is going on in other parts of the universe while Samas, Tony, John and Rodney change the world?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

May 2006

Sam clenched her fists and bit back a curse as she found another wrong connection. Unfortunately, every wrong connection meant this blasted door shocked her with enough electricity to make her fingers numb.

“No luck?” Cameron asked.

“No,” Sam said as she leaned back on her heels and shook her hands out. “Clearly this world knew a little more about wiring than the average medieval society.”

“Not medieval,” Daniel said absent-mindedly, but he was focused on reading the list of charges the Devits had given them upon their arrest. Sam would have assumed that Daniel’s power of negotiation could get them out of this, but the document had an Ori symbol on it, so they were pretty much screwed.

“Teal’c’s going to be sorry he missed the party,” Cameron said as he leaned against the small barred window and studied the outside.

“He can come along for the next one,” Sam said. She studied the wiring behind the panel she’d finally exposed and started sorting through wires again. One of these held the latch in place, and if she didn’t save her team, there might not be a next time. It felt like Earth was alone on an island of sanity and the rest of the world was losing their minds. Even the Jaffa had started to turn to the Ori, and Sam honestly didn’t know how any of this would end up.

Jack never talked to her anymore, but she could see the way his eyes were haunted, and Daniel had turned back into the man she’d known that first year—always with his head in a book desperate to find one last answer. Except now Jack wasn’t as young or as sarcastic, and Daniel wasn’t half as idealistic. In ten years, Sam wondered if she was going to be one more refugee on Atlantis or maybe she’d be an engineer on some smuggling ship that tried to dodge around Ori space.

It had never felt this hopeless in the past.

But back then, they’d had allies. Or maybe back then she’d been younger and more idealistic. Who knew.

“So, is it hanging at noon or immolation at dawn?” Cameron asked. Daniel made a confused little noise and looked up, and for a half second, he seemed almost startled to see Cameron there.

“What?”

“The charges. What are we looking at?”

Daniel sighed. “Nothing good.” He looked over, and Sam felt the weight of it all fall on her shoulders again.

“I’m working on it,” she said, and ignoring her arms that ached from too many electrical jolts and her broken nails and numb fingertips, she went back to work. Then someone tapped “shave and a haircut” against the prison door, and all three of them froze.

“Is that…” Daniel stopped.

Yeah, Sam didn’t know how to end that question either. Who would know that pattern out here? She tapped back twice and then the cell went silent.

“Friendlies?” Cameron asked. He looked at Daniel like he was supposed to have some sort of magic decoder ring for all things remotely connected to communication. Daniel gave him a wide shrug. As much as Sam loved Cameron like a brother, sometimes he was an idiot. Worse, he as an idiot who had read too damn many reports that suggested that somehow SG1 was supposed to fix anything. Then again, every team needed an optimist, and he was it at this point. The rest of them were too worn down to believe in good triumphing over evil anymore. If it did, the Ori would have died thousands of years ago.

There was a thump at the door, and then it slid back on metal rails. An unfamiliar man with dark hair and a gaunt face grinned at them. “Fancy meeting you here. I don’t suppose anyone told you that these folks were hard-core Ori lovers before you came and did your meet and greet thing, huh?”

Cameron took a step forward. “Actually, we’d been here before and gotten a warm welcome.”

“Pre-Ori,” the new guy said. “Post-Ori, they’re not so much fun.” He wrinkled his nose, and Sam’s brain screamed that she knew him. However, she sure as hell couldn’t place him.

“And you are?” Cameron asked.

“Aadi. I’m not from around here.”

“Yeah. I got that,” Cameron said. “I’m Colonel Cameron Mitchell, this is Colonel Sam Carter, and Dr. Daniel Jackson.”

“SG1?” Aadi made a production out of looking at Cameron’s arm patch. “Yep, or at least part of it. I thought you guys had more members… a Jaffa maybe?”

Sam looked over at Daniel, and he looked as confused and alarmed as she felt. But meet and greet was his thing, and he stepped forward. “Teal’c is on another mission right now.”

Aadi nodded.

“And we would appreciate any help you could offer. Do you know where they put our packs and weapons?”

“Nope,” Aadi said fairly cheerfully. “But I know if we don’t get moving, we’re all going to get caught. There’s a service access up to the roof and from there I can get you out to the forest.”

Aadi turned to leave, but Cameron caught his arm. “We need to get to the Stargate.”

Aadi gave him an incredulous look. “The Stargate that’s surrounded by crazy praying lunatics? That Stargate?”

“Do you have another way off the planet?” Cameron asked with an edge of frustration in his voice. Sam inched closer to offer some tacit support.

The grin Aadi gave Cameron was really creepy. “I don’t know. I thought we might take the tel’tak I parked near the river and cloaked.” With that, he turned and hurried down the corridor.

Cameron turned and looked at Sam and then Daniel. “Is it just me or is that guy kinda weird.”

“More than kinda,” Daniel said. “Do we follow him.”

Cameron made eye contact with Sam, but she wasn’t going to second guess him command decision. She saw advantage and danger in following Aadi, even though her gut was saying to follow. After several seconds, Cameron sighed. “I guess we follow him or move the countryside and settle down because he’s probably right about the Gate. Come on.”

And then they were all three following Aadi down the corridor. “Keep your eyes peeled for our stuff,” Cameron told Daniel. One glance back and Sam knew that was a lost cause. Daniel had his puzzle-face on, the one that meant he planned to ignore everything including his own need to pee in favor of trying to figure out a mystery. Sure enough, he didn’t even answer.

Cameron rolled his eyes and then they reached a storage room with Aadi waiting at the open door. He was watching the hall nervously, his hand resting near a bag on his hip, so Sam was guessing he was armed. When Aadi gave them a perfectly executed military signal to move ahead, Sam knew something was seriously wrong. She looked at Cameron, and he had a concerned look, but he went into the room and up a ladder. Sam ushered Daniel up the ladder and the followed with Aadi coming up on her rear.

The sun was just coming up, and Sam could hear the calls to morning prayer. The sound never failed to make her sick at her stomach. All these people were sacrificing their lives to provide Ori with worship to power their egos. It was disgusting. Sam would rather die, and the horrible truth was that Earth might face that very choice.

Aadi kept low and led them across several roofs, leaping lightly from one to another. Sometimes he dropped to a knee and signaled for them to hold position, and Sam’s memory kept flashing to another. As they worked their way farther out from the center of town, the houses were farther apart until finally none of them dared to follow Aadi when he leapt across the alley below.

Cameron stood gesturing for Aadi, and he looked confused for a moment before he jumped back, not even out of breath.

“What’s wrong?”

“We can’t make that jump,” Cameron said as he gestured toward the gap.

Aadi looked at the next roof. “Well, crap. Okay, we can move to the ground. They should all be happily worshipping at this point. Just be prepared to run like hell, and try to avoid being seen. My mission requires stealth, and that generally means not getting caught by the locals.”

“Your mission?” Daniel asked.

Aadi smiled. “Dirty pictures. I have the best job in the whole fucking universe.” It was something so completely incongruous with his image as a wiry and poor farmer that Sam didn’t even process his words right way. But then he was climbing over the wall of the house and sliding or climbing down—all because he needed to find a path where they could follow. This was going down on her list of twenty strangest rescues. It wasn’t in the top ten, but it was moving up past Mahg Mar and their toxic environment.

Again, Cameron went first, leaving Daniel the middle position. With the villagers at prayer, they moved quickly through abandoned back alleys, stopping behind a three story public building of some sort. Aadi was leaning against the gray wall with a rather smug expression. Carter frowned when she spotted the graffiti.

“Seriously?” Cameron asked. “That’s your mission?”

Daniel snickered, and Aari’s grin got wider.

Yep, that was a dirty picture. A crude drawing of an Ori prior with a penis larger than his arm was splashed across the wall with red paint. It even had little drops to suggest ejaculation.

“I put an even better one near the center of town,” Aadi said, and I was going to get creative on the mayor’s house, but then I heard they had you and I figured getting you three out would annoy the priors even more than a few drawings. So, you ready to make the final run?” Aadi asked, and his gaze went straight to Daniel.

He did look a little out of breath, but Sam was surprised a stranger would notice.

Daniel gave a thumbs up.

“Good man,” Aadi said. “I’ll cover from the rear. Head west and keep quiet. I’ll catch up with you as soon as I make sure our retreat is clear… or until I clear it.”

“Splitting up could be dangerous,” Cameron said.

“For you, sure. Me? I’m indestructible,” Aadi said. “Go. Keep low.” He gave the gesture to move out, and ignoring all protocol and ignoring Cameron’s subtle gesture to hold position, Daniel took off running.

Cameron spared him a frustrated glare and then took off after him.

“I will find you, Colonel,” Aadi promised, and Sam felt sure that he would. She nodded before she followed her team in running for the forest.

 

The debriefing back at SGC was interesting. Landry had been less than pleased that Daniel had followed Aadi’s orders in the field, but as Daniel explained, he’d been following Jack’s orders for a hell of a lot of years and it had generally worked out in the end. The fact that this was a Jack symbiote in a host didn’t really change the fact that he was going to trust Jack. And leave it to Daniel to figure out what impossible thing was going on before the rest of them had even bought a vowel.

Cameron had explained that he had not known Aadi was a host to a goa’uld until the host had caught up with them in the woods. Aadi had explained that Colonel O’Neill’s symbiote on the Unas homewold had, in fact, been killed. However, queens took the memories from the DNA of the symbiote. So, the symbiote that had been in Jack’s head during the mission where they’d recovered Gibbs, Samas, and DiNozzo had managed to pass on Jack’s memories, even if it had died. Aadi himself was unfamiliar with SG1, so he’d allowed the Jack symbiote to take the lead with his team.

And the Jack symbiote had been gleeful as he explained the tactical advantage of dirty pictures. If Jack had succeeded in killing a prior, the Ori would have wiped out the planet—a quick and simple maneuver that would leave them plenty of time to do other damage in the universe.

Instead, the dirty pictures left the Ori wondering why the prior’s message had failed with someone. The prior had to investigate the people and try and find the non-believer. The ships slowed as they tried to find the flaw in their recruitment program that left so many unbelieving youth on planets they thought they’d converted to the worship of the Ori.

“So, they’re trying to defeat the Ori with graffiti,” Landry said, still not sounding convinced. “That seems like trying to kill someone with paper cuts.”

“Sir,” Sam said, “Aadi and the other hosts that are conducting this guerrilla war know they can’t win, but this distracts the Ori. It distracts them from us.” Sam was more than a little thrilled to hear that her own symbiote children and grandchildren liked to infiltrate strongholds and set booby traps. Sometimes her symbiote kids paired up with Tony’s for long-term intel gathering missions. Jack’s symbiotes sometimes paired with her, but a lot of times he either did solo missions or went with Daniel’s symbiotes as they tried to undo the actual preaching.

Daniel nodded. He’d been equally as amused. “It’s brilliant. Kali and Yu know they can’t fight, so they just try to keep the Ori off our doorstep as long as possible.”

“And when we win, those two are going to have armies of young, strong goa’uld with the memories of SG1.” Landry clearly hated the idea.

“The Jack snake seemed to want to get back to the water, sir,” Cameron said. “I’m not sure he’s going to want to help Yu and Kali with any plans for universal domination.”

“That’s what he wants now.”

Sam thought about Samas and all the reports from Atlantis. He’d never once tried to take over, even when the leadership of the city had seemed a little weak. Hell, after their disastrous run of bad military leaders, Samas probably could have had his own rebellion, and he hadn’t. From the stories Sam had heard from her friends on the city, Samas swam under the city about as often as he lived in the gunny’s head.

“Sir, since we don’t control the onac symbiotes, I don’t think we can do anything except take advantage of the time they’re buying us, them and the hosts who are risking their lives to carry this war to Ori worlds.”

Landry looked around at the table. “Could we send symbiote poison to the unas home world?”

Sam felt that suggestion like a kick to the guts. Landry was suggesting genocide against a people who were, at least for the moment, on their side. Cameron sat up straighter, and Sam could see her horror reflected in his expression. It was Daniel who answered.

“That won’t do anything except piss them off,” Daniel said firmly. “I’ve known Jack for ten years, and he only pretends to be stupid. The second he took a host, he ordered the entire population either off planet or far enough away from the gate to neutralize the risk of symbiote poison.”

Landry wasn’t that easily distracted. “How can you know? Was the poison even developed at the time of the mission where you were all compromised?”

“There was talk of it,” Daniel said, “and I know because I know Jack. He took steps to make sure his own people were safe before he revealed himself. Now if you will excuse me, I need to go call our Jack before he hears about this through the grapevine. General.” Daniel gave Landry a polite nod, but then he got up and walked out without permission. That would be Daniel’s pissy mood.

Sam made a few conciliatory noises in Daniel’s wake, but General Landry quickly ended the meeting and dismissed them, leaving Sam and Cameron headed for the elevators. Sam played with the idea of calling Jack herself. Sometimes Daniel wound him up more than he calmed the general down.

Cameron gave a dramatic sigh. “I miss all the fun stuff. I’m an officially member of SG1, but no one is offering to have little Cameron snakes running around screwing with the Ori.”

Sam gave him an incredulous look. “I dare you to say that around the general.”

“He’s not going to be amused, huh?”

“Oh no. Not even a little,” Sam said. “But on the good side, this means that there are a whole bunch of Jacks out there making the Ori miserable.” For the first time in a long, damn time, Sam felt a spark of hope.

“And a whole bunch of Daniel Jacksons, Tony DiNozzos and Sam Carters.” Cameron nodded. “I’m almost feeling sorry for the Ori now.” He grinned at her and started whistling as he walked off the elevator.


	2. 2019, and the IOC Has Still Not Gone Public

Tony stood in the familiar hallway and soaked in the irony. NCIS hadn't changed much. Jo was slightly derisive of that. Life was movement, and if they did not move, they would not live. Tony was a little more philosophical. The director had changed to a man named Vance; however, the flush of money after 9-11 had dried up, so the buildings wouldn't have changed. The people inside were likely different. Of the four guards that met them, Tony had only recognized one, and that man failed to recognize Tony.

"Teams have secured two hostiles," Lorne said quietly.

"Locals?"

"Not even close," Lorne said with a grimace.

Tony sighed. That could mean goa'uld trying to grab a queen, and Jo wanted to rattle in fury at the very thought--or else the Lucian alliance was getting more aggressive in their "fact-finding" missions. At least with goa'uld, you could find them and squash them. The Lucian alliance was more like a nest of cockroaches that scattered when the lights went on. Their raids onto Earth were getting annoying.

"We secure?"

Lorne nodded. "For now. Secretary of State is en route rather than trying to have us move around too much. We have a half-dozen intelligence agencies in the field trying to figure out what high-value target has people mobilizing."

Tony really hated being that target. He would rather be the one trying to track someone down. Jo agreed. "I should make Gibbs do this part," Tony muttered. Of course Gibbs couldn't. Someone would notice his lack of aging. Besides, Samas could only stay in for an hour at a time. If Gibbs was going to be off Atlantis, he had to take one of the younger Turi. Jo also pointed out that Tony had skills on the verbal battlefield that Gibbs lacked. Tony could feel her confidence that she was the best queen. Tony rolled his eyes. If Samas were here, he'd bite your tail off for thinking it, Tony thought at her.

She laughed and sent back an image of Samas getting no more than a nip before Jo darted off into the murky waters leaving Samas behind. There was a playfulness in the image, a sense of dangerous teasing and a desire to have Samas taste her blood, even if she could produce children of her own. There was even a quiet note of longing that she could never curl up with Samas the way Tony could Gibbs. It made her hungry to taste the affection Tony shared with Jethro.

But despite all that very un-onac familial affection, Tony's Turi definitely had some arrogance going. It shouldn't surprise him because Tony knew he had more than a little himself. He was good, and the Secretary of State was about to find that out. Tony had already outmaneuvered the Chinese President, and the fact that the Americans didn't even rate him high enough to meet with their president was making him a little grouchy. He might not even tell them that he'd found their missing SG team. Oh, he'd still lead one of his teams to rescue them, but the Americans had definitely forgotten that the Turi nation was a lot more connected and a lot more dangerous. People talked to them, either because they trusted them to protect good people or because they were scared shitless. The fact that the Traveler ships they used were staffed with insane people made them even scarier. Even after all these years, Tony still couldn't figure out if Travelers were honestly that fatalistic and terrifying or if that was a ruse they used to make people keep their distance.

"Private conversation?" Lorne asked.

"You know how it goes with the little woman," Tony said with an eyebrow wiggle. Jo sent images of rattling her fins at him. She was not the little woman.

Lorne laughed. "We both have the scary end of that problem," he agreed.

Tony assumed Lorne meant Abby since Miko had never really come out of her shell—although Abby loved to tell the story of how Miko went off on Lorne’s mother when the woman started her anti-military rhetoric during a visit. But as much as Lorne might talk about Abby like she was frightening--probably because she was—he couldn’t talk about either of his partners without looking half sick with love. He was so whipped.

"Tony?" A familiar voice called, and Tony turned to see McGee moving toward him. Lorne gave a small signal, and three Marines stood down before tackling McGee to the floor, which they had been about to do.

"McGeek!" Tony called out. He saw McGee's small flinch, but the man kept his smile in place.

"Tony," he said again, holding his hand out. "I haven't seen you in years."

Tony took McGee's hand and pulled him in for a one-armed hug. "Miss me?"

McGee scoffed. "Do I miss having someone call me names and glue my keys down on my keyboard?" He grinned. "Maybe a little. Are Abby and Gibbs here?"

"No, they're on base," Tony said. As far as he was concerned, the government should start coming out with the secrets of the Stargate program, but he wouldn't poke that bit of Earther stupidity. "However, this is Colonel Evan Lorne, Abby's husband."

McGee's eyes got big. "This is Evan?"

Lorne laughed. "I take it you were expecting something different?"

McGee seemed to pull himself free of his shock and he held out a hand to shake it. "Abby talks about how you're an artist stuck in the body of a military officer. I guess I didn't expect you to be so military."

"Abby always did have a reputation for going for the outcasts and oddballs," Tony said as the two men shook hands.

"I fit that better than I like to admit," Lorne said with a smile. "It's very nice to meet you Agent McGee. Abby reads me all your letters."

McGee started turning red, and Tony made a mental note to steal those letters. What had McGee been writing?

"So you're still doing the Agent Afloat thing?" McGee looked at Tony with a sort of pity. "I heard Gibbs just hit mandatory retirement, although I honestly thought he was there a few years ago."

Tony shrugged. "He's semi-retired and semi tracking down Marines who get drunk on leave and still kicking their asses. It’s hard to convince him to stop hanging around the office when he’s still good at the job."

For a second, McGee just stared at Tony. After years… hell decades… of being away, Tony didn’t know how to translate that expression anymore. Then McGee frowned. "God, Tony, what did you do to your career? I mean, I know you have a sort of father-worship thing going with Gibbs, but you're never going to get promoted to the big jobs if you don't get back into the ring." McGee leaned closer. "I'm a team lead now, and I have a good relationship with Leon Vance. I could get you a transfer back, maybe get you a team. You've worked under Gibbs long enough."

Tony could feel a wave of indignation from Jo, but Tony was mostly amused. "I'm doing fine, McWorry." Out of the corner of his eye, Tony could see Lorne trying to hold back laughter.

"DiNozzo, if that's a father thing you have going with Gibbs, I'm scarred for life," Lorne said.

Tony grinned. "Oh please. After you get back from hard missions, I've seen Abby throw herself on you and kiss you hard enough that I'm pretty sure it counts as sex in more conservative countries."

Lorne turned pink, but he didn't give up that easily. "I've never pinned her against a prep table and given her a hickey large enough to require medical intervention."

"Once," Tony said with mock frustration. "Gibbs did that once, and after how badly we traumatized General Sheppard, we promised to never again take foreplay into the kitchens."

As expected, McGee's face was a riot of shock and confusion. "You?" he asked. "Gibbs?" His voice went up. "Together?"

"Since before they transferred to the base," Lorne said with a wide grin. The man had a little touch of sadism in him. Tony admired that.

McGee's voice squeaked. "Together?"

"Yes, Probie," Tony said wearily, although honestly he was enjoying this too much, "together. As in we have sex. Often. Loudly. Enthusiastically."

Tony could have kept going, but McGee held up his hand to stop him. "Okay, I get it. You and Gibbs are gay."

"Bisexual, actually," Tony said. "but considering that I'm never going to have sex with anyone other than Gibbs, gay works." Tony figured the two of them had a good two or three hundred years of sex to look forward to.

"But rule twelve," McGee said weakly.

"Which is to blame for us not having sex earlier, but given time and effort, I managed to convince Gibbs that is the stupidest rule ever. I mean the head of our military is openly sleeping with the head of our science department who is also his team member. Evan here is married to Abby who is the queen of the labs who handles any samples he brings back, and he’s applied for special exception status to marry his second wife. I'm sleeping with Gibbs, Radek is married today a local woman. The base's retired civilian leader has stayed on base after marrying a former leader of a local military contingent. Evan's teammate Parrish is sleeping with one of Evan's Marines. Honestly, I think the whole fraternization regs got lost somewhere because we pretty much treat sex like a healthy, normal thing that adults do. Happily. Often.

"And this is a ship?" McGee asked in a bewildered voice.

Tony grinned. "It's a ship and a local base, and the military has to share authority."

"And they're okay with this?" McGee was definitely sounding a little broken.

Tony made a show of thinking about that. "It's a dangerous job, McGee. The military is willing to let us do our own thing as long as they get results. So how is Ziva doing?"

"She's been working in translations since the injury. She likes it down there," McGee said. The injury. Tony had no idea how she had managed to get herself in the middle of a gunfight between a rogue Mossad agent and NCIS fast response units, but she was lucky she was only paralyzed. Part of him felt a niggle of guilt that he should have been here to look after his ninja probette, but that had been another lifetime. He had other responsibilities now.

"And you're a team lead. Good for you."

McGee gave a shy grin. "We handle all major crimes that have a strong cyberlink. Embezzling, blackmail, even some murder for hire when it crosses into the dark net. My team is the best when it comes to tracking people out of the electronic world and into the real one."

"Good for you!" Tony said, and he meant it. He was proud that the probie who had once been so afraid of his own shadow had turned into a confident team lead who clearly took a lot of pride in his people. He didn't keep up with folks back on Earth the way Abby did, but he knew that McGee had good people--some woman from NSA, a retired Marine with field experience and a background in hacking, and a supernerd McGee had actually mentored as a boy. He'd joined Big Brothers and raised his own probie.

"If you moved back here, you could have this, Tony. You could pick your own team, lead a major response unit--not in cybercrimes, clearly--but you could get back on track with your career. And if Gibbs is retired, he could work on boat building and sailing."

"Aw. That's cute. You're worried about me."

"Dammit, Tony, you never take anything seriously. You're getting too old to keep ignoring your future." McGee sounded almost angry, and Tony took a step back. The three Marines and Ronon all looked ready to step in. Ronon in particular looked furious at having someone question Tony's motives or ability to take care of his own business. They'd known each other a long time, though, and Ronon knew that Tony sometimes encouraged people to underestimate him. They couldn't blame McGee for falling for Tony's obfuscations. He sent a quick hand signal to make Ronon back off.

"McGee, just because my work is classified and I can't talk about it doesn't mean that I'm wasting my life."

"Classified." McGee spat the word out almost angrily. "Every time I talk to you, it's always about how your work is classified. I know for a fact that you aren't involved in any high-level NCIS cases. People in MTAC don't even recognize your name. Your login is never used, and Vance has no idea why NCIS even keeps you on the payroll. Don't give me the classified line and expect me to believe it like some stupid little probie who doesn't know how to verify a story."

Lorne stepped forward. "Special Agent McGee, maybe you should rethink your approach."

"Colonel Lorne, this is between me and Tony," McGee said.

Tony felt a little flash of pride that McGee could stand up for himself now. Of course, he was also being a rude little ass, but sometimes McGee did forget where the appropriate line was.

Putting a hand on Lorne's arm, Tony urged him to step aside. Jo wanted to rip into McGee and shove every success in the man's face, but Tony didn't want to do that either. He just wanted McGee to be happy for him—Tony had a job and a relationship and a home, and Tony had never managed to have all three of those at the same time before in his life.

"Timmy, you have your life and I have mine. Don't expect that I'm going to measure success by doing things the way you would have done them. I'm happy with my job and my relationship, so congratulate me and move on."

"But you could do so much more," McGee complained.

"Doubt that," Lorne said under his breath. Now Tony understood what he meant. Tony was the Turi ambassador. He was one-sixth of the ruling council of Atlantis and one of the most well-known leaders in two galaxies. The Turi-Satetean people were a small group, but they were a thriving culture based on kicking ass and taking names, and more and more people were learning to avoid the wrong end of stupid when they were around. The Travelers were scary in a 'what the hell are the crazy people going to do' sort of way. The Turi Sateteans were scary in a 'if you cross them, they'll rip out your spine and use it for a doorstop' sort of way. Given a choice of having the President of the United States as an ally or having Tony, most of the universe would be trying to woo Tony. The President could go piss in a bush for all people cared about him.

But McGee didn't know any of that. His world was smaller, and without knowing any of what Tony did, he interpreted Lorne's comment in the most logical and most backwards way possible.

McGee’s expression turned murderous as he whirled around to confront Lorne. "Don't even say that. Yeah, Tony comes off as some frat boy, but he has more intelligence in his finger than you have in your whole head. I can't believe Abby would have married anyone who couldn't see through the act to the real Tony--the one who always gets the job done and who finds solutions that no one else can see. And yeah, maybe he puts on a front, and yeah, maybe he's not the best with technology, but he can do a hell of a lot better than arresting drunk Marines on a Friday night." McGee finished that up with a poke to Lorne's chest with a sharp finger. Lorne raised an eyebrow, and Ronon looked almost amused.

"Wow. Way to come to my defense needlessly but in a still very appreciated way," Tony said. He caught McGee's wrist and pulled his hand away from Lorne's chest. "Down boy."

"He shouldn't talk about you like that."

"He didn't mean it that way," Tony said. "He just thinks I'm doing pretty damn well."

McGee pressed his lips together and looked from one to the other, clearly not willing to let this drop but equally unsure about how he should handle it. Tony was about to make a suggestion that they meet for coffee later after everyone's temper had cooled, but then he spotted a new player.

A man in a suit was coming through security, and his eyes scanned the people in the lobby until he spotted Tony. He picked up his briefcase, and one of Tony's Marines moved to intercept him. The other two Marines moved to cover, and Ronon pushed past McGee to take his place next to Tony.

"Hey!" McGee protested, but then he looked around. He really was coming into his own as an investigator and agent because he immediately spotted the trouble and moved to the side of the room, his hand hovering near his weapon.

The suit showed the Marine identification, and the Marine took it and stepped backwards before handing the ID off to one of his buddies. That Marine brought it to Tony. "He says he's from the State department."

Tony took a deep breath and let the senses Jo offered him expand. Truthfulness. The man was telling the truth and he was stressed. "Let him through," Tony said. He handed the ID back and slipped his hand inside his pocket. If triggered, neural disrupter would disable everyone except him and Ronon. Their symbiotes understood the technology and could compensate for it.

"Ambassador DiNozzo," the man said, holding out his hand. Tony quickly shook it. "I'm Jonathan Pressing. The Secretary is very sorry, but security is getting difficult. He has been forced to detour to a secure location rather than lead interested parties back here."

Off to the side, McGee's eyes had gotten large.

Tony ignored him and focused on the task at hand. "Does he have a suggestion about where to meet?"

"He doesn't know if he can secure a location that you could easily reach. So far no one has realized that you're in town, but given time, certain out of town parties are likely to figure it out."

Pressing was being rather circumspect, but Tony could read between the lines. Locals had spotted either goa'uld or Lucians. He nodded. "We have a plan in place to reach the White House."

"We can't secure the perimeter," Pressing said too quickly. So they had a serious out of town problem. Tony might be forced to use local site to site beaming, but he preferred to keep that technology quiet a little longer.

"My Marines can make a little noise somewhere else--Ronon and I can penetrate the perimeter as long as the White House itself is secure."

Pressing frowned. "Sir... I wouldn't--"

"But I would," Tony said. Trust me, if the day comes that I can't penetrate the White House perimeter, I need to go back and have Gibbs kick my ass until I'm back up to par."

"I'll do the ass kicking for you," Ronon offered. Tony looked over and he grinned. Yeah, he knew his symbiotes were some of Jo's favorites and he was gunning for another way to impress her.

"Show off," Tony said. He could feel the flash of yes-pride-spawn from Ronon's symbiote. Ronon just send him a cocky grin.

Lorne spoke up. "Tony, I don't like the idea of you going out on your own. If something happens, Gibbs will kill me, and my wives will be two steps behind him ready to shred any pieces he leaves in tact."

"Then I'll be careful," Tony said. "Take two cars. Lorne, get a little wild and reckless."

Lorne nodded and finished for him, "And I'll have the sergeant take things slow and be more cautious. I’m on the record saying I hate this, but they'll probably assume you're with me."

"Unless they think we're trying to fake them out by having me with the more cautious driver," Tony pointed out. Either way, their enemies likely wouldn't guess that Tony and Ronon were on foot.

Pressing looked worried, but he nodded. "I'll let the Secretary of State and President know that you're trying to get through."

Tony narrowed his eyes as a new thought occurred to him. This could be a ruse to try and get out of meeting with him. He felt the echo as Ronon picked up his thought. Ronon was not pleased at the idea that the Americans would disrespect them that way. Tony didn't actually mind. If the President and Secretary of State were playing games, they were about to figure out that one Turi queen was more than a match for the Secret Service. Tony mentally sent up an apology prayer to Kate because he was about to hand her people their asses on a plate.

McGee's eyes were so big they looked ready to fall out of his face.

“Sorry, McGee. Duty calls. I’ll try to call you later, but I’m on a tight timeline here. And hey, congratulations on the team lead position. I’m proud of you.” Tony gave him a wave before he headed toward the back exit, Ronon on his tail. This was going to be fun.


	3. Somewhere in another reality, Tony leaves NCIS

**The Reveal**

Tony leaned back in his chair and studied the two men who had come to do an exit interview. He’d seen a lot of people leave NCIS, some quitting and others transferring, but he’d never seen the agency require an exit interview from any outside organization. These two were definitely not NCIS. The skinny one had all the twitches of a frontline military asset. Even when he leaned against the wall in his sweatshirt and jeans, there was something in his gaze that suggested he was checking for threats. And the stockier one… Tony had no idea what to make of him.

One second he was totally immersed in his laptop and the next he was looking around as though expecting Al Qaeda to jump out from behind a chair.

“So, are we going to get this going?” Tony asked. Whatever weirdness this was, and Tony was betting on CIA, he wanted it over. He had a new life to create, a fresh version of Tony to discover, a world of pain and failure to put behind him. He had things to do people.

“Rodney,” the skinny one drawled.

“Yes, yes, I’m working on it. Do you want it fast or do you want it secure?”

“Both would be nice.”

Rodney looked up long enough to scowl at him.

Hopefully Tony could speed this along. “This is a secure conference room. No audio. No video. Whatever you want to discuss, this is where the secure discussions happen.” He smiled at the dynamic duo. Rodney snorted and Mr. Lanky ignored him. Great. “Maybe I should go out for a coffee.”

“Or not,” Mr. Lanky said.

Tony narrowed his eyes.

Immediately, Mr. Lanky raised his hands in surrender, although he didn’t move from his spot next to the exit so that wasn’t all that reassuring. “Agent DiNozzo, we have procedures we have to go through and if you open that door, we have to start them all over again. This would be a lot easier if you would come to Colorado, but we’re trying to work with you here. Just give Rodney a second.” 

“Colorado. You want me to come to Colorado for an exit interview?” This was getting weirder by the second.

“More like a potential entrance interview,” Mr. Lanky said.

“Yeah, thanks, but no thanks.” Tony stood.

Rodney looked up. “You don’t even know what you’re saying ‘no’ to. Answering without all relevant information is stupid, and since we have it on good authority that you aren’t actually as stupid as you’re pretending, stop distracting me with your pointless antics.”

Tony stared at Rodney.

“And that’s Rodney’s version of a compliment,” Mr. Lanky said wearily. “You do actually get used to him, you know, like the way you get used to athlete’s feet.”

The words were an insult, but Mr. Lanky gazed at Rodney fondly.

“Which doesn’t explain why you like him,” Tony said. He wasn’t sure what the relationship was here, but he wasn’t above poking a few buttons to get some answers.

“Ha!” Rodney poked a finger in Mr. Lanky’s direction. “I told you he wasn’t stupid.”

“Actually you told both of us,” Mr. Lanky said, which didn’t make a whole lot of sense, but Rodney quieted for a second.

Finally Rodney slapped his hand down on the table. “Got it. I swear the NSA gets bitchier every time I beat one of their bugs, so this had better be worth it.”

“The NSA?” Tony had to get Abby up here if one of the NCIS rooms had been compromised. He took a step toward the door.

Mr. Lanky sidestepped to block it. “They probably only bugged the place because they heard we were coming. Colonel John Sheppard.” Mr. Lanky, AKA Colonel John Sheppard, held out his hand to shake.

“You’re young for a colonel.” 

Rodney snorted. “Not really, he just got blessed with an unfair number of good genes. I’m Dr. Rodney McKay.”

“Doctor? Of what?” 

“Physics, astrophysics, and mechanical engineering. Since there’s no way you could figure out the right questions to ask, Sheppard is just going to tell you the truth about aliens.”

Tony’s brain got stuck on that last word.”

“Rodney, we agreed I would talk to him.”

“So talk. I’m not stopping you.” Rodney made a broad ‘go on’ gesture with his hands.

“After you dropped the verbal A-bomb, my opening doesn’t exactly work.”

Rodney snorted. “I heard your opening. You took too long to get down to the important stuff, like how he should move to Atlantis.”

“Atlantis?” Tony really hoped he had misheard and these guys wanted him to move to Atlantic City, maybe because they were from the mob and had an illegal alien-slash-immigration problem. He could work with that.

Colonel Sheppard held out a thin report with classified stamps all over it. “Technically this is above your current classification, but after Rodney ran his mouth, I doubt you’re going to sign any non-disclosure agreements without seeing it first. But if anyone asks, make sure you tell them that we had you sign shit before we let you read any of that.”

Tony sank down into his seat as he read about aliens masquerading as gods and enslaving early Earth. Names he couldn’t hope to pronounce were mixed in with descriptions of genocide, space travel, and multiple attempts to destroy the planet. Normally Tony lazed his way through reading, covering a page several times as he searched for inconsistencies or studied someone’s writing style, but he didn’t bother. He tore through the pages, reading faster than he had since college. By the time he got to the discover of Atlantis and the destruction of the Ori, he was fairly sure this was the most elaborate prank to ever grace the halls of NCIS. 

Tony had pulled some good ones over the years, but he knew full well that Gibbs hid his own mile-wide streak of sadistic humor. Normally Gibbs simply enjoyed the aftermath of Tony’s pranks, which is one reason why he had pulled them so often back during the Kate and Ziva years. However, this… this was a fucking masterpiece. It even had all the military lingo and official stamps to make it look real. However, Tony wasn’t an idiot. There were too many amateur stargazers to keep something like this quiet.

He tossed the report on the table where it slid to the middle. “Good joke. So, is this Gibbs? I can’t see Vance having this sort of humor.”

The colonel and Rodney exchanged looks. Now that Tony knew where this was going, he leaned back to enjoy the show. This Rodney was one hell of a good actor. He was playing at being tactless and open, which was an almost impossible front to put on. Tony knew.

“I brought video,” Rodney said slowly, as though reluctant to share.

“Yeah? Do you have any idea how many aliens I’ve watched burst out of people’s chests or blow up DC?” Tony made a tsking sound. “You’ll need to do better than CGI.”

“You know, I’m starting to wonder why the other I would have said I liked you so much,” Rodney complained, which didn’t actually make any sense. However, he took a round sphere and rolled it across the table. It was the size of a tennis ball and completely smooth. Tony caught it, waiting to see where this little prop would lead. “Go on,” Rodney said with more hand waving. “Think ‘on’ or ‘truth’ or whatever you think when you want alien technology to work.”

“Whenever I think what?” Tony laughed.

Rodney crossed his arms. “Just do it.”

The colonel sat down next to Tony. “When he gets that tone going, it’s usually just easier to go along. Unless someone is shooting at you, then I recommend you shove him into the nearest transportation device and deal with his bitching later.”

Rodney’s glare turned vicious. “Hardy-har Colonel Bipolar. People shoot you, and you’re all ‘no problem,’ but let one girl look at me and you think the world is ending.”

“Because she was trying to end the world,” the colonel shot right back. These two had clearly worked together a long time and either they really liked each other or they really didn’t. Tony was having trouble telling. Colonel Sheppard turned to Tony. “Alien tech is attuned to mental commands. Think ‘on’ or ‘run’ and the recorder will brief you on the current situation in Atlantis.” He held up a quick finger. “But remember! You signed the non-disclosure stuff before we showed you this. And next time O’Neill asks me to give the ‘aliens are real’ speech, I’m coming down with another deadly virus.”

Tony humored them. He held the sphere and thought ‘on.’ Immediately, he was thrust into a stream of information. Environmentals were green. The new planet they’d landed the city on had abundant mineral sources, but there was a lack of silicon for some replication needs. A sense of joy filled Tony, and then more information rushed into his head. The drone replicator factory needed silicon and how could she protect her people if she didn’t have drones, and they had moved her, but her undercarriage was damaged from the last Wraith attack, and she’d been so afraid that she could lose integrity, although she was happy to be back in Pegasus and when was Hers coming back. She needed him to discover the damage to the flight doors, but no one was taking out puddle jumpers. Tony nearly threw up as a single stray thought about what a puddle jumper was led to technical schematics being shoved into his head. He was lost, drowning in information, but Tony forced his fingers to open. A last thought hit him. The others couldn’t hear her. They didn’t know. She needed him to tell them. 

Then the ball rolled out of his open hand and Tony had the sensation of falling back into his body. Sheppard was kneeling next to him, a hand on Tony’s shoulder. “Deep breaths. You’re okay.”

“It never hit you like that.” Rodney sounded concerned.

Tony sorted through his thoughts. Aliens were real. He had absolutely no doubt about that. And Sheppard was one of them. Tony looked at Colonel Sheppard as another fact filtered up through the static. Colonel Sheppard didn’t know that. Tony blinked, and slowly sorted important from trivial facts.

“The flight doors on the puddle jumper bay are stuck and there’s structural damage on the underside of the city. I get the feeling it’s in a place where self-repairs aren’t possible, and you could have lost integrity on that last flight.”

Colonel Sheppard reared back and turned to look at Rodney, who was busily typing. “Do you know what sector?”

“I got a sense that it was on the sunward side of the flight drive.”

“Sunward side when we asked the device to record the current situation or sunward side now?”

Tony closed his eyes and slowed his breathing. “Sunward side now.”

“West, then,” Rodney said. “When I said you had the strongest link to the city, I wasn’t wrong.”

Tony opened his eyes. “You said that? But you don’t know me? And the city is short of silicon. She can’t start replication of defensive drones without a high quality supply, but her sensors don’t show any on the current planet.”

“Replication? We can make our own drones?” Colonel Sheppard stood. “Why didn’t we know we could make drones?”

“Because I’m too busy trying to keep you from blowing up the city to do the sort of exploration that would require. You know, the other me had a lot more time for science.”

Tony looked back and forth between these two men, his head stuffed so full of new information that he felt like he might start bleeding out his ears. “Why did you come to me with this?”

Colonel Sheppard sat down again. “There is technology that we call quantum mirrors, although they aren’t all mirrors. Sometimes people from realities close to ours cross a quantum boundary and visit for a little while.”

“Or get stuck and slowly shake themselves to death at the atomic level,” Rodney added.

Sheppard glared at him. “These visitors went home with no death involved, but their world had a much stronger Atlantis, more technology, more allies, more ships.”

“More everything,” Rodney added in a rather disgruntled tone. He was jealous of another universe.

“For example, the other Rodney managed to unlock the formula for recharging a ZPM,” Sheppard said in a cruel tone.

Rodney slammed his laptop shut. “And the other Sheppard was up for a promotion to general.” Score one for Rodney because that hit Sheppard so hard he flinched. However, his expression quickly smoothed.

“One of their suggestions was that we might look up certain people who had proved vital to their success.”

“And in this other universe, what? I joined the military?” Tony shuddered at the thought.

“Actually, you followed Gibbs in,” Sheppard said.

Tony nodded. There had been a day that he would have followed Gibbs anywhere. Of course that had been before the secrets and the abandonment, before he’d had the truth of Gibbs’ illegal activities shoved in his face and suffered the worst of Gibbs’ temper. Tony still respected the man, but he hadn’t been willing to blindly follow him for a long time now.

“Are you and Gibbs sleeping together in this universe?” Rodney asked.

Tony couldn’t breathe. He absolutely couldn’t. And Rodney just babbled on.

“I suppose that makes sense since Gibbs doesn’t have Samas in this universe. From the sounds of it, Samas was far more reasonable than Gibbs. Atlantis has enough military minds already, but it would have been nice to have the sort of long-term thinking Samas could have provided.”

“I don’t think the IOC agrees,” Sheppard said. “They disapprove of aliens.”

“They disapprove of anyone who doesn’t kiss their ass, which explains why the two of us are on their hit list,” Rodney said, and from Sheppard’s grimace, he agreed.

“The IOC?”

Sheppard pushed a thick packet of papers toward Tony. “Would you be willing to sign the non-disclosure agreements now? There’s no obligation involved, but this give the International Oversight Committee the right to bury you under a military jail if you run off and publish any of this information on an alien abduction website. Some of the conspiracy theories are frighteningly close to reality.”

Tony wanted in on this. Pulling the papers closer, he grabbed his pen and started reading.

 

**The Reaction**

“Señor, please, to watch your step,” the guide said for the hundredth time. Tony was starting to regret giving the cover story he had. He was Antonio Piozetti, a new age guru seeking the spirits of the Aztec ancestors. After telling Sheppard and McKay he had to think about all the information they’d give him, Tony had gone to ground. Using fake IDs he’d set up in his most paranoid moments, he’d made his way to Colombia. If Gibbs had decided to body share with an alien queen who’d been trapped for years, then she was in Colombia. Tony knew his ex-boss well enough to know that was the only point in his life that the control-freak known as Leroy Jethro Gibbs would have been willing to give up some of that control.

To a queen.

Tony’s head was going to need shrinking after all this. He wondered if he could get the program to read in Kate’s sister.

But before that, he had business to take care of. In the other universe, this Samas had helped build alliances. She had fought the goa’uld and watched her children die. She had saved Gibbs. Tony still felt the tightness around his heart when he thought of Gibbs. For him, Gibbs had been the father figure, but like his real father, Gibbs had proved too flawed for the job. Either that or Tony had too high of expectations for male role models. He expected them to follow the law instead of breaking it when it suited their needs. Neither of his father figures could manage that.

Of course, from what he’d gotten out of Rodney, Samas wasn’t one for following laws either, but she’d done everything she could to fix what her people had done wrong. 

Tony actually liked Rodney. He had a lack of artifice and a blunt honesty that soothed Tony’s nerves. There was no manipulating or lying coming from that corner. Tony had the feeling Sheppard had more layers to him, but he’d stood back, silent and watching, as Tony had wrung way too much information out of Rodney. 

If they’d come to recruit him, they’d given him far too much information, and Sheppard knew it. Tony could see that in every flinch when Rodney would mention a new name or bring up a new topic. But Sheppard hadn’t shut them down. Four hours they’d gone over everything that had happened in the last fifteen years, and Sheppard had stood down and allowed it. And then he’d allowed Tony to walk out without taking a job.

Sheppard might be covert ops, but he didn’t like living in the slimy end of the pool. And that made Tony want to trust him. But out here somewhere was a Turi who had fought her whole life to do the right thing, and the IOC was literally leaving her out in the cold because they were afraid of what she might do. Tony didn’t know what Samas would do, either. However, Gibbs had trusted her. Apparently when Gibbs and Samas had shared their life, Tony had fallen in love with Gibbs. That suggested that both Tony and the Gibbs in the other universe trusted her.

And Tony wasn’t used to leaving a teammate behind.

He wasn’t going to start now. He’d insisted they go after Ziva. He’d dived into freezing water to save Gibbs. He’d be damned if his first action as Atlantis’ new agent afloat was going to be to abandon Samas in the rivers of Colombia.

The guide stopped, and Tony checked the GPS on his burner phone. This was where Gibbs had come during his Colombia op during that year of hell. He’d just lost his family, and the service had chosen that moment to ask him to go on what amounted to a suicide mission. If some other Gibbs had found Samas, it would have been near here.

“This is el rio. You see, now we go back to hotel.”

“Nope.” Tony pulled his backpack off and sat on the nearest rock. “I’m going to sit in that water and commune with the spirits of the Aztec.” Or he was going to hope the queen of a long-dead alien empire heard him, one or the other. Actually, both sounded a little nuts.

“This is… not safe. Take many pictures and look those when we are in the hotel.”

Tony stripped off his boots. He’d told the guide he didn’t speak Spanish, so he didn’t react when the guide ranted in Spanish about the insanity of white people and the way having money made people’s brain cells die at a terrifying rate. When Tony stripped off his pants, the guide retreated to the tree line and tried again.

“Señor, the country. Much safer now, but this is not all safe.”

Tony picked up his backpack and waded into the river. The first touch of the water stole his breath. “Fuck, that’s cold.”

“The water is from mountains. You are done now, yes?”

“I am done no,” Tony said as he waded in. A little cold wouldn’t kill him, and if Samas was still here, it would take time for her to realize someone was looking for her. But Rodney had insisted that she could sense thoughts from the chemicals on a person’s skin. That was a turi’s primary form of communication, well, right after burrowing into someone’s brain. That was a concern, but Tony reminded himself that both alternate universe Tony and alternate universe Gibbs had trusted her. Sometimes a suspect would get past one or the other of them, but Tony had never seen anyone fool both. And Gibbs had taken Samas back in after sharing a brain, so Tony doubted there were many secrets there.

He wondered what it would be like to have a partner that literally couldn’t keep secrets.

Propping his backpack with his weapon on a large rock, Tony slowly settled into the water while his guide cursed him out in Spanish. The man had a creative streak with his profanity. 

Once he was in the water, the cold wasn’t as biting, and Tony took out a book.

“Señor!” his guide protested.

“The Epic of Gilgamesh,” Tony said as he held the cover up for his guide to see. “It’s about a half-human, half-god hero named Gilgamesh and Shamash who helped save him and the entire city of Uruk. They were heroes, and heroes deserve better than to be forgotten, don’t you think?” Tony was fairly sure the guide didn’t understand much of that, but he did get one message: Tony was not leaving.

With one last Spanish complaint about crazy tourists, the guide started back down the trail leaving Tony alone on his manhunt, or queenhunt. Tony had a good record for getting his man. Renny Grant had gotten away, but Tony had allowed that to atone for his part in wrongfully convicting the man for embezzlement. If Tony had been a better leader—demanding that Tim follow the computer leads or pushing the director to allow them more time—Renny never would have gone to jail. Instead Tony had been too insecure in his position to do what was right.

He was older now. More stubborn. And he learned from his mistakes. He wasn’t going to walk away because it was easier. Nope. He was going to wander through this jungle and sit in every damn river he could find until he either found his queen or had enough evidence to conclude that she hadn’t escaped in this universe. And then and only then would Tony call Sheppard and figure the rest out.

He had a plan. Now Tony just needed it to come together. He leaned back, let the sun warm his shoulders as the water froze his assets and started reading about Shamash back when she’d been helping humans stick it to the gods who had ruled them.


End file.
